Tea and Strumpets, aka "Gold Bikini Syndrome"

I have now officially participated as a vendor in a Renaissance Faire. Although sales were slow, I got lots of complements and several organizers of other events invited me to theirs to peddle my wares. Highland Games? Sure, I’ll do that. Pagan BrideFest? Probably not, but thanks for asking.

I’ll blog more about the experience once I have some time to process it all. It was a real learning experience, and I am exhausted both mentally and physically. I’d like to say a BIG thank-you to Uncle Jimmy (who DID end up staying for Sunday because he rocks) for set-up, for manning the booth, and for providing the care and feeding of the vendor for four days. Mom and the Funkytowners also get a shout-out for all their help.

But of course I have to be sarcastic now and write some observations on the RennFaire way of life. I admit that I like to dress up in period costume and pretend I’m a princess or a warrior. But I also like to NOT do that. Some of the Fairegoers do not have an off switch as far as I can tell. There are beautiful costumes straight out of Lord of the Rings or Braveheart for the lords and the ladies. These are all fine, but then there are the girls who seem to have learned about the Renaissance from the video game Gauntlet or possibly from Lucy Lawless.

These women are not confined to RennFaires- oh no, I’ve seen them before. I call it “Gold Bikini Syndrome.” Patients who come down with this are generally women in their teens or twenties who are attractive but not generally considered beautiful in society as a whole. More drama queen than prom queen. But in a  subset of society that is largely populated by males who have spent an inordinate amount of time painting pewter figurines in their parents’ basements while learning to speak wood elvish, a female with both a pulse and a common interest becomes a goddess.

So our "attractive but normally overlooked" girl learns that she can command attention by just being involved in the lifestyle, but how can she become worshipped? She can become worshipped by removing as many pieces of clothing as possible. The result is full-scale medieval attention-whoring. (I apologize for the terrible quality of this picture…I didn’t want her entourage of teenage Horny Potters to spot the camera and guillotine me or anything unpleasant like that)

The name of the syndrome is of course derived from the gold costume that Princess Leia wears in the beginning of Return of the Jedi. Pictures of this phenomenon can be seen here. Or here. Or here.  And for the Star Trek equivalent, try this. Lots of good A-W pics here from DragonCon (some awesome costumes, too).

So, like I said...more on the experience in a bit. I just had to share that picture. You can all thank me later.

Currently listening to: Bastille Day, by Rush (so who am I to call anyone out for being a nerd?!)
Quote OTD: A Faire contact juggler telling his feelings on Michael Moschen:
"Oh, yeah, that egomaniac acts like he invented contact juggling. Ugh."
 

Comments

[Marie]

Thanks for starting out my day with a laugh (albeit some scary photos). Your observations of the RennFaire actions are spot on to what I imagined it to be.

[Red Sonja]

Hello, I stumbled across your post and had to say something here. I am the young woman posing in the somewhat odd photo on your blog. I wanted to let you know that I was not there simply to show off my attire, but rather as a performer. I was portraying the comic book character Red Sonja. Over the years the Red Sonja character has been overshadowed by T.V ‘s Xena, which is a shame the characters were very different. I suppose you must have missed our show at 5; 30. I sword-fought (yes real swords, and no we do not use tape on the tips of our blades) with several of the gentlemen in my acting troupe. Normally we perform at comic cons but as I am a huge fan of the M.A.R.F., we decided to add it to our list of performances.
I would also like to have you know I honestly don't care how I look; I understand the costume may be shocking to some folks. If you look up the key words Red Sonja, Frank Thorne online you will see some of the character artwork and notice my costume is a replica of that. It is also rather easy to swordfight in which is what I do. By the way, I posed for many pictures through out the day and had you asked I would have been more then happy to do pose for a decent shot. In addition, I really do not like gold bikinis. This one is chainmail, its considered armor. I got the idea for wearing that from reading way to many comics as a child. All my life I have been proud of being such a tomboy. Should I wish to command the attention of young men I can do that in a nun’s outfit believe me! My costume was to promote the character whom I was manifesting during our skit. If men did notice my outfit then I hope they noticed it only as armor, you see I am quiet settled in a long-term relationship. The quality of this picture is pretty awful, I would be more then happy to send you a good one.
Know also that I am not angry with your comments; I just wanted you to know the whole story. My troupe and I were there promoting a comic convention called Geekapalooza, which I am the director of. You may be right about met not being pretty to the general public, but no one can really judge someone based on looks alone. Sunday it was not my wish to be attractive but rather to portray a character, Red Sonja.
Thanks,
Wendy Potter

[Randell Wolff]

You're a vendor? That means your purpose is to sell things, yes?

It doesn't seem like very good business sense to me to ridicule the people who are your patrons.

But I guess you're laughing all the way to the bank, as they say.

[tara goodwin]

i think its a great thing with what she is doing if u would have came bye ower stand u would have know what she was doing and yes i was a part of the crew she had it all for a good caues

[Otis]

I read 100 books!

[ChaoticZer0]

Maybe you should learn how to use spell check... It wouldn't hurt and it wouldn't make you look like an idiot.

[old gray mare]

Wooohooo! Me thinks ye struck a nerve faire Leila!

[Red Sonja]

Geek Gang, I was very offended when I first stumbled across Leila’s entry. I have said my piece and she has apologized. Please take a look at her next entry and you will see she and I have struck a banner of truce. Thank your for standing up for me, though it wasn’t and isn’t necessary, I know you love me. Please calm yourselves though, she simply stated her opinion. We have let it go; now my crew I am asking you to do the same. Take a look at her next entry and I believe you will feel a bit differently.
-Wendy