There is no one Loki in my family. We all are merry pranksters, but probably the head of them is my aunt. So if I get the snot beat out of me today, it’s all her fault.
Check your calendars.
Got it? Good.
So today I took a cake in to work. A homemade German chocolate cake, with buttercream icing. Yummy. Just for our student workers, vultures who descend upon anything left in the break room with terrifying speed.
Except it’s german chocolate Zatarain’s cake with mashed potato icing. Mmmmm.
Step 1: Make the cake.
I chose german chocolate because it smells very strongly, to mask the smell of anything else I might put in it. After mixing it all up, I added 6 tbsps of Zatarain’s. I hate to waste lots of spices, but I’m an Old Bay kinda girl, and someone once gave me a huge jug o’ Zatarain’s. I also hate to throw things away, so it’s been sitting there on my spice rack ever since. It promised to “Jazz up” my cake, so I let it. Then I added about 4 tbsps of red pepper for good measure.
I could have gone all out with the additions, but I didn’t want the flavor/smell to be so overpowering that my victims understood immediately that they’d been duped. I wanted a slow realization, fork in hand, mouth kind of hanging open, eyes starting to water kind of reaction.
*Note – although I knew damn well what was in the mix, I had an almost an overpowering urge to lick the bowl after I put the cakes in the oven. It was just like that passage in “On the Beach” when the guy almost smokes the radiation cigarettes when he’s on the submarine.
Step 2: Make the icing.
I boiled a metric shit-ton of potatoes, because I wasn’t sure how many it would take to ice a cake, and also I made potatoes with dinner last night anyway. After removing those that we were actually going to eat, I let the Kitchenaid Stand mixer prove its worth. I, as my dad would say, “Cranked it up to 10 and let it eat”. Just so you know, potatoes, when overmashed, get really sticky and gluey and not unlike cake icing. Aces.
After a bit I checked the potatoes and was shocked to discover that despite looking like icing, they still smelled like potatoes. So I added some vanilla extract. And then some more.
Step 3: Ice the cake
Surprisingly simple. It went on easier than actual buttercream.
Step 4: Decorate the cake
I made some actual icing and decorated the cake as if it was a birthday cake for my buddy. Isn’t she a lucky girl?
Step 5: Complete the illusion
I cut out a big chunk of the cake, then put candles on it and lit them, then blew them out and took them off and put them on the plate in an attempt to make it appear as if we had a party, the birthday girl blew out her candles, and then the cutter of the cake removed the burned candles and placed them to the side.
The cake is now in the break room, with festive little plates beside it. Updates soon, hopefully.
UPDATE - 1:13 pm:
The first victim was Chandler, and I knew it would be, because that kid loves cake. He was wandering around his office muching on it, and apparently even got HIS boss to eat some to see if it tasted weird. Then he came back to my office to see what kind of recipe I'd used. I was in the loo at the time, and my officemates convinced him that it was a family recipe and that I was very sensitive about my baking abilities. So when I came back, he KEPT eating it.
He finally figured it out when I almost fell over laughing.
Then he got in on the action, telling everyone how great the cake was, and at lunchtime it got even better.
I've duped four other people with it so far, and each of them became part of the prank, telling others how fantastic the cake was and how they MUST try some. One guy even ate a SECOND PIECE to convince someone else that it wasn't an April Fool's Prank. That's taking one for the team right there.
Ahhh. *laces fingers behind head and leans back in the chair, savoring the moment*
That was well-worth the price of a 5-lb bag of potatoes and 2 hours of my life in prep time.