Gnumoon's Stuff

I met Katrina's brother Ivan last year.

Since I've been following this Katrina business, it reminded me that we're almost at the anniversary of Hurricane Ivan. Ivan devastated the High Country, trapping lots of us and causing lots of damage. I was not yet a blogger at that time, but I assure you that my posts would have been interesting.

On September 16, 2004 it started raining, and it didn’t stop. Because we had to be in town for a work function (I’ll not go into what it was or why I was pissed that we had to risk life & limb to be there), we watched the rising waters with trepidation, ready to evacuate if necessary. Our house sits high on a ridge, but the road to get there runs alongside the river for a good ways, so we kept an eye on it.

The family slept in the hallway that night in case a falling tree plunged through the windows or roof, and it wasn’t a good rest. You could hear, almost feel, the weight of the water as it flowed anxiously and endlessly over the house and down the mountain. About five a.m. we could hear the river churning and decided to get out while we still could, and we loaded up ourselves and the dog into the already-packed SUV. We thought “No problem! We’re prepared for this storm!” We made it to the bottom of the driveway.

The road was gone, turned into a canyon of rushing, churning water, and the rain was still falling hard. We walked back to the house and waited for the power to fail, for the world to end, or for it to stop raining. None of those things happened. But our work function also didn’t get cancelled, despite a state of emergency declaration in our county. We had no choice but to try to get to the main road (1.5 miles away) on foot.

Each of us had 2 backpacks, one had a dog on a leash, and the other had $4,000 worth of camera equipment. One of us had a suit packed in a garbage back packed in a backpack. We had the hope of rescue at the end of the road, assuming we could find our way there hiking through flooded backcountry.

It was completely surreal.

The pictures tell the rest of the story better than I could.
There are pictures missing from what turned out to be an almost three hour hike, because it was simply too dangerous to get the camera out. I never told some of the details, because I didn’t want to remember some of it.

The Big Queasy

I’ll talk about the rest of my art show later..unless you live under a rock, you know there is something more important on my mind. My dad grew up in Louisiana, and my cousin still lives in Baton Rouge- I am planning to go visit her on my trip to New Orleans in November, and I truly hope that there is still a New  Orleans to visit. Martha Ann told us that everyone has their bourbon ready and that huge batches of shrimp jambalaya have been made in case of power outage. If you're gonna get hit, you might as well have good booze and great food.

The Big Easy is a city that has long embraced its vulnerable position, and even thumbed its collective nose at the possibility of massive destruction…ever have a “hurricane?” There’s a reason that it is a strong frikkin drink, and it was invented and named by the inebriated and fun-loving citizens of New Orleans.

We’re all used to reporters crying wolf, but a category five storm isn’t crying wolf, it’s just crying. A 500-mile storm is just…a monster.

HOWEVER, I am getting increasingly annoyed by the doomsday coverage of this storm by the news networks. WE ALL KNOW that this is a serious situation. WE ALL KNOW that people are going to die. WE ALL KNOW that the destruction will be catastrophic. Is it really helping anyone to listen to Geraldo Rivera read the scariest NOAA warning ever on the air? He sounded honestly sad when there was a report that the storm had weakened. I guess there aren’t any journalistic accolades to be had for covering a mere Category 4 storm.

Rivera just talked to Kathleen Babineaux Blanco, the governor of Louisiana (she seems to be handling this horrible situation with the grace and poise of a true southern belle), and when the interview was over he actually said to her, “I just want you to know that I’m thinking about you.”

Well, whoopity-freaking-doo, Geraldo! THAT MAKES IT ALLL BETTER!

I bet that in 30 years when Mrs. Blanco is sitting around the virtual fire with her grandchildren and they ask her about Katrina, she’ll gaze off into space and back into the years and reply, “Well children, yes, New Orleans was a wonderful city before it was destroyed and replaced by New New Orleans, but our most important family legacy is that Geraldo Rivera himself told me personally that he was thinking of me.”
What a tool that guy is.

This situation should not be used for personal/professional gain, not for anyone. Not for journalists, politicians, or looters. In a related story, I read an account on Fark this morning about a guy whose father is being paid by the other tenants in his apartment building to stay behind and shoot at looters who try to get in. Here’s hoping he survives to collect his money.

Here’s to you, gulf coast. May you ride out this storm- I’m raising a digital Hurricane to you. Only Pat O’Briens makes ‘em better!

Currently Listening to: The news. We are news junkies in situations like this. Having a weatherman for a father-in-law makes us even worse.  My husband has already announced plans to sleep on the couch so he can watch storm coverage late into the night.
Currently Reading: Totalfark...I was proud to be a member this morning when people started offering space in their homes to displaced gulf coasters.

Banner Elk Show, Day One

Umm, yeah. I am exhausted from today's art show goodness. I am going to reserve judgement until after some sleep and after Sunday's show, but let's just say that I've had more financially productive days. :) It wasn't just my booth, though...there was show-wide "interested tirekicking" that didn't result in many sales.  The scene was pretty fun, though.

I'm not exactly looking forward to doing it all again tomorrow, but I think that's just the exhaustion talking. Plus, Max gets to go with us tomorrow. Yea!

ps- I hate that Tom was in town and didn't know about the show, but it sounds like his family had a great time in the High Country. The weather was coolish, with no humidity- I'm sure that was  a welcome change from the Queen city area (which is for some unknown reason one of the absolute hottest places on earth).

Banner Elk Arts Show

Just a heads-up...Gnumoon Mosaics will be representin' this weekend at the Banner Elk Fine Arts & Mastercrafts Fair. I am quite underprepared for this show, but I have some inventory built up so maybe things will take care of themselves. I hope, anyway. If you're in the High Country, stop by and say hello.

I might just send you home with a rock with your zodiac sign mosaicked on it. A highly practical piece- you can either put it in your garden OR crack men over the head with it in bars when they get too close and slur beerishly into your ear, "Hey baby, what's your sign?"

Currently Listening to: The Ring Song, by Bravery
Quote of the Day:  From The Dark Crystal
Jen: Wings?  I don't have wings!
Kira: Of course not.  You're a boy.

Photoshop Cartoon Phun

So some people were wondering how I made the “Captain Obvious” graphic- did I draw it freehand or did I somehow find a Superman-esque drawing that inexplicably looked exactly like my husband? Neither, really. I just used the magic of Photoshop to create a composite image that looks like a cartoon of DJ flying around. It is easy to do- here’s how.  (Note- This requires an amount of Photoshop savvy, because it uses layering, transforming, and other not-quite-intuitive PS tools)

For the purposes of this tutorial, let’s turn our good buddy Leah into 80’s cartoon pop icon Jem. Why? Because I have a picture of Leah dressed in 80’s garb for a party, and, like Jem, Leah’s husband’s name is Rio. Well, it's really Brian…but let’s call him Rio for now. And Leah does have magic earrings and a supercomputer named Synergy. So she basically is Jem.

OK, here we go…click HERE for the illustrated step-by-step process.

Let's Make Leah TRULY TRULY TRULY OUTRAGEOUS!
Step 1 – Open the source image (“Leah”) and create a new layer over the original one (make sure your new layer is selected)
Step 2 – Select a brush that matches the “cartoon outline” look…I chose a 5 px, hard-edge brush, in black. On your new layer, trace the main features of your subject. It needs to still look like the person it is, just in a more posterized, simple form.
Step 3 – In a new document that contains your second source image (“Jem”), erase the features of the face you want to replace. Fill it back in with “flesh” coloring.
Step 4 – Copy and paste or drag your drawing layer from the “Leah” document into document #2.
Step 5 – Free transform until it matches (hold down shift to maintain proper ratios)
Step 6 – I added gnarly 80’s makeup, and I removed Leah's “Madonna” hairdo in favor of Jem’s famous pink locks. Be sure to clean up any stray lines to make it look seamless- details make the difference between a good Photoshop and a not-so-good one.

Currently Listening to: Welcome to the Jungle, by Guns 'n Roses (With 100% 80's hair band goodness!)
Currently Reading: Eaters of the Dead, by Michael Crichton

Down to the River

Life is too hectic at the moment. Unfortunately, it is also not interesting to blog about...unless you think that making print deadlines, heading up committees, and having umpteen major projects going at once is interesting. Nope, didn't think so. So instead, look at this pretty bird.

As I was driving to work this morning, head already spinning anticipating my workload for the day, I came around the corner and this guy was just chilling out in the river beside the road. He was so still and placid that he didn't even look real. What would it be like to have that much peace?
I almost didn't stop and get the camera out because I had so much to do at work.
The contrast between his life and mine is staggering.

Captain Obvious

I’m about to make a “Paul Reiser” post…not a “Company asshole from Aliens” Paul Reiser post, but rather an “aren’t my interpersonal relationships so interesting that other people want to hear all about them” Paul Reiser post. That was just a warning.

It is funny the things that you notice about your significant other once you’ve been together for a while. And the more you notice these things, the more you can sense them coming and, depending on your mood, these quirks will either amuse you greatly or annoy the living hell out of you. I am generally amused, unless I’m sleepy (as was the case last night, sorry about that, DJ).

Sometimes my husband turns into “Captain Obvious.” Captain Obvious swoops in occasionally to make astute observations about things that are readily apparent.
My favorite so far is this scenario (that has happened several times):

GNUMOON pads over to the door to the deck wearing a swimsuit and holding a drink in one hand and a towel in the other. 
Husband: “Hey, you going out to the hot tub?”

OR (this was last night and what got me thinking about all this)

GNUMOON has fallen asleep in the overstuffed chair in front of the TV while Husband is working on the computer until disgustingly late at night. She gets up and stretches, then walks sleepily into the bathroom to take out her contacts. Husband gets up from the computer and walks into the bathroom…
Husband: “Hey, you going to bed?”

He’s too polite to point out the same traits in me, but I’m sure that there is something (or perhaps many somethings) I do that he can see coming a mile away and choose to laugh or be annoyed about. Maybe he’ll enlighten me…

Currently Listening to: Rush radio...Working Man is on right now

Why, Mr. Top, I had no idea.

Seriously- it isn't a photoshop. I have no idea what to think of this.

ps- Yeah, that's a brushfire. Yeah, I went there  (in the joke sense that I "went there," not in the actual sense that I "went there").

More blowfish than you can shake 1995 at...

I know y'all want to see more pictures of the concert, so here you go.

Hootie Pictures

Sorry to be so sparse in my writing...this week is slammed here at my wonderful jay-oh-bee. On Monday a printer told us that a project I was banking on having at least three weeks to do is in fact due on Friday.
And I hadn't started it. And it is 116 pages long, plus 4 full-color cover pages. yeah.....
So I haven't slept much these past few days. It is really starting to show...I'm really jittery from all the coffee and I'm not making much sense anymore.

Having a Hoot

I love my husband very much. When you love someone, sometimes you do things they want to do instead of something that you want to do, such as go see their favorite band. So last night we went to the hipster Orange Peel in Asheville and caught the preeminent band of my bygone high school days, Hootie and the Blowfish.
So, admissions:

1. I admit I went to see the much-maligned Hootie and the Blowfish
2. I admit that they put on a pretty rockin' show. They included a nice send-up to the their southern rock influences with some Georgia Satellites and Blue Dogs, plus some sweet bluegrass jams.
3. I admit I was a little sad they didn't sing about chicken sandwiches like in the commercial.

I'm swamped at work today but I'll write more about the experience later, along with more pictures. On the picture front, I'm pretty impressed with my little Fuji FinePix that I bought more for its beer-resistant qualities than anything else.

ps- We met Darius Rucker. I have pictures. Husband was in Hootie Heaven.