Gnumoon's Stuff

hAPPY Halloween, now with ESPN goodness!

Thanks to my wonderful, spookiful co-workers, BlueRidgeBlog and the one and only ChunkyLover53 for making my gourds into a full-fledged photography event.

Happy Halloween everyone!

The alpha and the Yo-mega

ESPN wanted pumpkins, and pumpkins they shall have. I still have one more to do (which will be an admittedly shameless ploy to get onto SportsCenter), so hopefully I can wrap these up in the morning.

The lettering in the Block A logo damn near killed me dead. But it turned out nicely, I think. (The shine is from Vaseline. A good jack-o-lantern tip is to smear an oil-based lubricant on the cut parts of the pumpkin to keep the moisture from evaporating and to prevent the skin from shriveling up. It's also good for myriad sophomoric jokes about using vaseline to prevent moisture loss and shriveling.)

Here are the 2 I've done today lit up (yes, I had to do another Yosef head logo. I'm very tired of that particular one):

Halloween Goings-on

Sorry I haven't updated. I've just been so busy! A few bits to report:
1. My Barack O'Lantern is in Newsweek! I haven't seen it yet, but apparently it's on page 27, with no carving credit given. Nuts on the no credit, but it's still pretty neat.
2. We went trick-or-treating 2 nights in a row with 2 different costumes. I told you I was Halloween hardcore. ha. Yesterday she was a turtle (turr-tull, she says). Tonight we were vampires and little miss Pookie was die fledermaus. (see photo --->)
3. ESPN is rolling into town to broadcast the game Friday night. They have requested THREE fancy carved up punkins, so that is my life for the near future. You can't say no to them - it's a national audience.I gutted the three and prepped them tonight, and I'll start hacking away at them tomorrow.
4. Pookie headbutted me and chipped my tooth. I spent the morning (Weds) at the dentist. I got some more dental-related news that def. warrants a blog post in the very near future.
5. Did I mention that I have to carve 3 pumpkins before Friday? That really puts a damper on my plans to go see Rocky Horror tomorrow night. But ... NATIONAL audience. I can't turn that down, not even for Tim Curry in a corset.

Oh the weather out side is frightful ...

Blue Ridge Blogger and I made this at work today:

It's the Great Pumpkin, redux

Halloween game? Football? Must be time for this, then.
I was up way too late making it. *yawn* {Thanks to BRB for da photo}

Photoshop Phriday: Obama accidentally attends the Puppy-Eating Vampire Association's fundraiser

Slow day at work. A friend emails me this photo.

The following conversation occurs:

Me: Nice photo.
Friend: Yes. Obama looks really nice in that tux, but McCain looks scary.
Me: Obama should be afraid of that vampire sitting in between them.
Friend: I think he's a Cardinal or something.
Me: I don't care what kind of bird he is, he looks like a bloodsucker.
Friend: Har har. Yeah, though, he does look like a vampire.
Me: *Fires up photoshop*
Me: (emailing hastily Photoshopped photo) I found a new photo from that dinner. Did you know it was actually a fundraiser for the Puppy-Eating Vampires Association? 
Friend: Yep, I'd suspected as much. Damn PEVA bastards. 

  

Barack O-lantern

So it begins. As you know, I'm really only in my element in the autumn, paring knife in hand, carving up some pumpkins (or as Pookie adorably calls them, "pop-keys"). I decided to go with "Current events" for my first effort this season, so here is my Barack-o-lantern. Or just the Oblantern, if brevity is your thing.
It is Obama's profile, with the campaign logo cut (backwards) into the back of the pumpkin, so that the candle lights the front while throwing the logo-shaped shadow onto a wall. It was a reasonably successful effort, but I may try again in a few days and see if I can't get it perfect.
Note: Someone asked why I didn't use the smiling headshot as my inspiration, and it's because when you're doing a person on a pumpkin, teeth tend to look rather grotesque. Last year's King Leonidas from 300 was an exception. He was supposed to look intimidating.
I've submitted it over at www.yeswecarve.com, so we'll see what people think.

Fall Pookie Photos

It's been the perfect autumn day up here. I could barely contain my joy at how beautiful it was, with the leaves changing and the blue sky and the pumpkins and the apples and the kettle corn and on and on ...
So I grabbed a camera and took some shots of my little skeleton.
So happy!

Then my model got tired of modeling:

In the happy photo she has a cookie. In the sad photo she has an apple. Wonder if it's related?

Fall from Danner Cemetary

Because you can't have Halloween without ween: Hot Male Costumes

I'm over the election. Over it. I watch the debates, I roll my eyes. I will vote, because I always vote, and I will watch the returns until the wee hours, because I always do, but I am over it. I'm tired of stupid people (on both sides) with loud mouths go on and on. So instead of writing a well thought-out, intelligent post about the debates and the issues, I am going to tackle a much more pressing problem.
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Halloween has been dubbed "Hookerween" or "Whoreiween" (wait, I may have made that one up) because it's like the day has become an excuse for every female to dress as sluttily as possible and call it a costume. Sexy Vampire, Hot nurse, MILF-y zombie Hitler, the list goes on.

But I don't see much attention being paid to hot costumes for guys. So here they are, backed up by much scientific research. Note: "Pirate" did not make the list. I know that the Depp-o-philes will disagree here, but I think pirates look like they are very stinky, which is a major hit to the hot-o-meter.

Hot:
Highlander - Not the show/movie. An actual, Scottish, kilt-wearing, dirk-wielding (see what I did there?) Highlander. Nothing in the world is hotter than a guy with nice legs in a skirt. Extra points for red hair. See: Liam Neeson, Ewan MacGregor. They can take our underoos, but they'll never take our freedom.

Viking - we come from the land of the ice and snow, indeed. Maybe it's the horned hat or the fur shorts. Maybe the bloodlust? In any case, it's manly as all getout. A good choice for hardbodied blondes who are tired of being Vigo the Carpathian from Ghostbusters II or Fabio every year.

Batman - Tortured. Angst-filled. Brooding. Smoldering eyes. Chiseled cheekbones. *fans self*  {Unless it's the Adam West version, in which case it's still on the good list because it's funny without being pathetic. But be warned that there will be no fanning of self with this version.}
Note: Above offer does not apply to Robin.

Musketeer - I am Gnumoon, and I approve this costume. Unless it's too feathery, or looks like you ganked it from your high school's theater department.

Westley - To the victor go the spoils, and if you have eyes like the sea after a storm, look good in all black, can withstand the machine (but not to 50) and oppose the damaging of perfect breasts, all the girlies will be yours. As. You. Wish.

Darth Maul - Hot, if you spring for the FX contact lenses and can get someone to do the makeup right. Note: the degree of difficulty may be higher than the payoff. A regular old Jedi knight getup is much easier, and probably just as much a panty-dropper with the right set of fangirls. That said, don't just put on an old bathrobe and call it a Jedi costume, because that is lamer than Cliegg Lars.

Indiana Jones - Everyone loves Dr. Jones. If you're lucky at the party, Dr. Shneider might want to head back to the catacombs and check out Reggie, amiright? *wink, wink, nudge, nudge*

Blade - As vampire hunters go, Blade is sexier than Hopkins' Van Helsing. {He was also half-vampire, with the heart of a human, or whatever that silly tagline was.} I'll call it a draw between Blade and Hugh Jackman's Van Helsing for "hottest vampire hunter."

Wolverine - Another badass inclusion on the list. If you have the body for the spandex, go for it. If not, the leather-clad, cigar smoking version works just fine.

Not at all hot:
Lederhosen - the Bavarian thing is really really sexy. On a chick. I assure you guys, wear  lederhosen, and the girls at the bar will feel like they're getting hit on by one of the Von Trapp children. Not exactly the intended effect.

Pimp - No. You look ridiculous. Take off that purple crushed velvet hat before someone kicks your ass.

Superman - The ultimate goody two-shoes. 95% of guys can't pull of the outfit, and the 5% who can are so into themselves it isn't worth the effort. Even worse if he has the little ringlet-y spit-curl too. Ugh.

Werewolf - If you can pull this one off successfully, you're probably excessively hairy, like clean-out-the-drain-and-make-a-tribble-doll hairy. And this costume will do nothing but draw lots of attention to that fact. You get a pass if you are actually being Michael J. Fox in Teen Wolf, though. Because that's original and cute, and a drunk girl at a Halloween party will likely find that hot enough.

Gladiator/Spartan - A worse "OMG my eyes are burning : bow-chicka-wow-wow" ratio than Superman. You're much more likely to end up going home alone only to discover oft-commented photos of your costume on Facebook. And not kind comments either. {Note: I'm talking moobs here.}

Gorilla - At every party, there is some dude who shows up dressed as a gorilla. It is always vaguely disconcerting, because you never know for SURE who it is. It could be Michael Myers in there. And even if it isn't, you know it's all grundel-sweat-tastic under all that matted fur and black rubber.
This same basic rule applies to all costumes with a mask that covers the whole face, such as the Scream guy or Leatherface. The only exception is Darth Vader, because he's a badass.

Phantom of the Opera - You're just trying way too hard to get the theater geek chicks to go home with you. Points awarded ONLY if under the mask you have gnarly scar makeup. 
If you must for some reason don a cape and a white mask, may I suggest "V"? 

Raggedy Andy - If you thought this was hot, you should probably just stay home and hand out candy. Unless the judge said you can't be within 200 feet of children.

Boba Fett - Girls aren't nearly as impressed with the ol' bounty hunter as guys are, although an exception may be made in the event that you perfect a working jetpack in the next three weeks.

Hugh Hefner - Hef was a virgin until well into his 20s. Just saying.
Although it's slightly less lame than wearing a bathrobe and pretending to be a Jedi, I guess.

And always remember: We love Tim Curry, but no character he has ever played is hot. So don't try to win over the girls by dressing as Frank-n-furter, the Lord of Darkness, Pennywise the Dancing Clown, Rooster, King Arthur, or Hexxus.

A QUICK REFERENCE TABLE:
HOT - NOT
Batman - Robin
Jango Fett - Boba Fett
Severus Snape - Harry Potter
Sweeney Todd - Willy Wonka
A Ghostbuster - The "King" from Burger King
Gomez Addams - Herman Munster
The Gunslinger - The Lone Ranger
Aladdin - Bin Laden
Scorpion - a scorpion
Ghost Rider - Thor

Special Section: Are Vampires Hot or Not?
Hot:  Alucard Belmont (Half-vampire, Symphony of the Night. It's my list, I say he's hot), Jesse Hooker (Near Dark), Lestat de Lioncourt (Interview with a Vampire), David (Lost Boys), Blade (Blade), Dracula (Bram Stoker's Dracula), Spike (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)

Not Hot: Dracula (Bram Stoker's Dracula), Maximillian (Vampire in Brooklyn - too silly to be hot), Radu (Subspecies), Dracula (Monster Squad), Barlow (Salem's Lot), Jerry Dandridge (Fright Night), Count Orlock (Nosferatu). 

Hotness to be determined: Edward (Twilight)

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I'm sure I've left out lots of others. Any suggestions?