I admit, I rolled my eyes when I heard there was going to be a fourth installment to the Terminator series. But then I heard Christian Bale was involved, and then I saw the first trailer, and thought, "maybe?"
And then tonight they released the new trailer for it, and I'm just completely on-board. Here it is, along with some great stills. My only problem so far is Kate Connor. (ah gad, that makes them "John and Kate," ick (see post 2 below))
Mrs. Connor is the only human in the resistance who isn't covered with dirt and crap. Her hair is lustrous and stunning! She is aglow and dewy with the joy of pregnancy! They had time while fighting robots to not only get married, but consummate said marriage and then have a nice shower. Give me a break. She'd look like hell just like the rest of them.
Also, I'm assuming that Sarah has been killed off in this installment, but wouldn't that mother-in-law drama make for an interesting side story? (She and Kyle didn't get a nice wedding, nooo, all they got was a coupla hours in a roadside no-tel mo-tel.)
Aw hell, Kate is played by Bryce Dallas Howard, who for some reason always gets a pass with me. So carry on. (Full disclosure: I liked The Village. So there.)
Other movies I'm excited to see this season (that I will inevitably not get to see due to some conflict with a babysitter or a sporting event of some kind) include Watchmen, Wolverine, and Angels & Demons (The last fourth of that book is utter shite, but I'll go for the Ewan McGregor goodness).
Buuut, all this trailer-watching got me thinking. If they can resurrect Terminator after such a godawful, piss-poor third effort, why can't they conceivably do the same thing with the Aliens franchise? (This Terminator movie even has its own Bishop. Awww)
I know Hollywood is out of ideas, they're remaking The Neverending Story, fer Pete's sake. So studio exec types: listen up to my thoughts on this.
Go back to when the series was still the rockinest thing going, which was right at the end of Aliens in the mid-80s. Ripley, Hicks and Newt are frozen, heading for home. That was where they went so wrong, bringing in a director (David Fincher of Seven)to helm the third installment who had a social commentary to push. Look dude, we don't want your agenda or your "original creative storyline."
You come in here and you kill off the best characters before the movie even starts? The characters Ripley fought so hard to save, and then you plunk her down in the middle of some penal colony with a bunch of bald rapists? Piss off. Alien 3 is the Rocky 5 of the series.
The only cool scene in the whole movie is the end, when Ripley does that beautiful back-dive into the molten lead and embraces the xenomorph baby as it pops out of her chest.
OK, so have that last scene play, and then have Ripley wake up from a horrible nightmare (she has a history of this knowwhattimean). She is older and seemingly safe and sound, but still plagued by these recurring nightmares. She is married to Kyle Reese Dwayne Hicks, Newt has grown up and has a family of her own, and all is well. Weyland-Yutani, the Monsanto of space, is still holding the cosmos in their greedy grip, but Ellen has decided to let it go. Perhaps she and Hiram Coffey Dwayne have moved to France and own a vineyard or some such thing. Besides the nightmares, it's a nice little quaint life.
But then The Company starts doing experiments with the aliens, and bring them to the labs ON EARTH. OH NOES! DUN DUN DUN. {It opens up some great "Planet of the Apes"-esque "It was on earth!" possibilities for scenes. Tastefully done, of course. Aliens cruising up the Eiffel tower might look a bit cheesy. I'm imagining the alien in a beret and a stripey boatneck shirt. Perhaps half a poodle sticking out of its mouths too.}
Anyway, so our happy couple are home, enjoying a glass of fine bordeaux and some afternoon sunlight, when a car comes up their drive, a cloud of dust billowing up behind it. The car is driving too fast, and it screeches to a halt in front of their maison. Out steps (slow panning up shot here, to reveal the face last), is Bishop. OHHHH YEAH. Ellen and James Curran Dwayne exchange a horrified, knowing look ...
Come on, this movie would be awesome and it would kick all kinds of ass. I'm sure Weaver would be in for it, and you can't tell me that Michael Biehn wouldn't jump at the chance to reprise his role. If Newt didn't want to be in a movie, she'd be easily replaced for her few scenes, and surely Lance Henricksen would be jacked up to do this and put Pumpkinhead: Resurrection on the backburner for a year or so. Hell, cast Winona Ryder in it too, since her whole contribution to the series just got nuked from orbit.*
Hollywood, listen to me. I know what I'm talking about. I personally devoted myself to becoming a screenwriter for TWO SEMESTERS of college. That's like eight whole MONTHS. I went to some workshops and everything. One of the writers from Strictly Ballroom even categorized my work as "promising." You hear that? Promising. All I'm really doing here is fulfilling my destiny. Now all you have to do is listen.
* - Alien: Resurrection gets a lot of shit unfairly. It was a solid effort, entertaining and keeping with the plotline that was handed down. Ripley uses her sinew and pulse-rifle to great effect, we get to see her once again be maternal (and how!), and there has rarely been a more disturbing scene in a movie than when she walks into the "I think I'm a clone now" room.
And the scene where the 2 adolescent aliens kill the other one for the acid blood is great - it's exactly how those interstellar farkers would do it.
** - For the love of Paul Reiser, do not get me started on the AvP series.
OMG! I have never even seen an Alien movie, but I would totally go see yours!
Posted by: wendy | March 03, 2009 at 08:46 AM